Adoption Options: Domestic or International Adoption?
There were a few different adoption options. However, the day after we discussed moving forward with adoption, I was on the internet exploring international adoption. While the boys were in school, I spent h-o-u-r-s viewing websites of adoption agencies. The number of agencies, the countries each agency covered, the different timelines, and the varying financial costs were overwhelming to me. I poured over countless websites of agencies — local, in state, nearby states, and across the States. We narrowed down our search to a few in state agencies that covered Asian adoptions.
Each country had specific guidelines. We reviewed the qualifying requirements. For a number of countries, we were at the older end of the age limit. We had two biological children. With these two factors, already we were not identified as a highly desirable adoptive couple. I felt guilty when thinking about childless couples struggling with infertility. We considered adopting a child with special needs — a child with a medical or emotional condition, a child with a physical impairment. We started sharing our dream with others, talking openly about our desire to adopt and our efforts. We sold our second car to raise funds. Then we were told no.
My husband does not drink, smoke, or use recreational drugs. He makes a decent income as our primary breadwinner. He has a health body mass index. He does take an anti-anxiety medication. We were informed that most Asian countries flat out refuse applicants who were prescribed psychotropic medications for emotional conditions.